Beat 282 - Angelic

 

An immortalizing white tattoo of Liam's initials - LSB - on Stephanie's wrist.

"My heart has been broken into a million pieces. Most days I wonder if it is broken beyond repair. But then sometimes, I think I feel it slowly piecing back together.
The reason my heart is broken is because my son was born with broken heart. His name is Liam Sebastian and he was born on August 5th, 2010 with a very complex heart defect. On the day he was born, my heart was full. It was full of love that I never knew possible. Unconditional. Perfect love. When we found out how sick he was later that night, my heart was full of fear and shock. Over the next twelve days, my heart was on a permanent roller coaster ride. Every day, every minute, alternated between hope and total fear. As I watched my son fight for his life, my heart was full of anger, questions, doubt and everything in between. The day the doctors told us that he couldn't get better, my heart cried in agony and went numb with grief. On August 17th, 2010, my son died in my arms. My heart died with him. It shattered into a million pieces until it was unrecognizable.
It has been almost sixteen months since I said goodbye to my son. My heart is still broken, but I can feel it slowly rebuilding. I know my heart will never be the same, but the love and support of family and friends, the charity work I do in his honor and the memories of my son, have all helped my heart start to heal. My heart still misses Liam every minute of every day. It still has moments of anger and sadness. But my heart also has room to appreciate that my son came into my life. That he impacted more people in twelve days than some do in a lifetime. And even though I didn't think it was possible, my heart somehow has room for hope again."

-Stephanie Burns, Minneapolis, MN